I have no talent
There is no shame
In that - I do not
Know music it
Alludes me those
Notes of who the
Hell cares why "Every
Good Boy Does Fine"
That was always my
Answer: to how was
My day? How is the
food? How are
Classes? How are you?
Fine it was all fine
To move on I need to
Come to terms with him
In my life: his yelling,
His pacing, his need for
Silence: put that down
The I need to hear me
Think: the little space
We were in: five people
Two rooms. What an
American dream: it was
Silence and sleep then
Yelling: not acceptable
This or that was not
Acceptable and I was
Not acceptable: there
was something wrong
with me: it all became
My fight and my mother
Let it become my fight
I was stronger: his names
For me in anger did not
Phase me: I gave as good
As he could give: he would
Dress and go away: come
Back and watch the game
Silence was needed then
Total silence: if the cow
boys won all was well if
they lost it was nails on
chalk board: it wasn't all bad
He never hit me not even
When I burnt my mother's
Hand. He took me to a room
Asked me if I did and even
As I lied: he didn't strike me
He stopped an inch from face
With one slap from his hands
My jaw would have broken
For all his hands did was play
88 keys 7 days a week and twice
On Sunday: part of me wishes
He had struck me: it would have
Silenced my dream of him ever
loving me. as he was dying I held
his hand and he thought I was his
wife, my mom: and he whispered
he was sorry how he made so many
mistakes - how he loved his sons: how
He loved her and perhaps had he
Mentioned me I would have forgiven
He didn't and so I didn't and now he's
Dead and part of me wants him to
Know I won that last fight and I proved
Him wrong I'm not just a whore with a
Pretty hat
And fuck it - I forgive him
